Was I a Good Mom?

That question crosses my mind every Mother's Day. Did I do all for my kids that I could have as they were growing up? Did I teach them all the lessons they need to sustain themselves in adulthood? Was I always there for them?

The answer to all three of those questions, I'm afraid, is NO! The reason for that answer is because it is impossible to fulfill the "all" and "always" requirement.

This morning during our adult Sunday school class, we touched on the subject of guilt as moms. The discussion started with the fact that we judge ourselves. Do I judge my abilities as a parent? All the time.

I wish my daughter and granddaughter had been in church with me this morning, but they weren't. I feel that is my fault because I didn't impress upon my daughter the importance of honoring the sabbath when she was a child. Church is important when it's convenient, but not a priority.

It would have been nice to have had a Mother's Day card or even a Facebook greeting from my son, kind of a reminder that he is thinking of me on this day that honors mothers, even though he now lives in a different country and thousands of miles separate us.

Okay, so I'm having a pity party. It's not really all that bad. This evening, my daughter and granddaughter and I will attend our church youth group fundraiser together, which entails a delicious dinner and a play that I'm sure will be wonderful entertainment.

We don't hear from our son as often as I'd like, but I'm also proud that he possesses the independence and the initiative to make his own life. Accepting the fact that we are no longer an integral part of it is difficult, but also cause for pride. He's making a substantial living, supporting a wife, and pursuing career goals.

Our daughter is a wonderful mom. She's a great cook, and she sure didn't get that from me! I like to think that I have been s a positive influence in her life. She shows initiative and works hard, She is well respected in the community, at her job, and by her friends. She's raising our granddaughter to love God and believe in herself and always be kind to others.

I'm fortunate in that she is close by, for the time being, anyway. Still, she has her own life and that is a good thing. I'm proud that she, like our son, is independent and self-reliant. I'm excited for what the future holds for her and glad that she has the courage to face whatever challenges lie in store.

When I connect with our son, usually on line, I know he is genuinely glad to be in touch. I have very little idea of what his life is like overseas. No, he's not in the service, but I'm sure things are different in the UK than they are here in the states. He, too, has faced new opportunities and hard times with a strong spirit and a desire for adventure.

I wish I could say I have always been there for my kids in the ways that they have needed me to be. Sometimes I have and sometimes I haven't. There were times when I let my own opinions, my own dreams for them, and my own pride get in the way.

As a parent, I have regrets about my shortcomings as a mom. At the same time, I am grateful for every joyful moment, every term of endearment, every hug, every "I love you" my kids have ever shared with me. They are many, and I treasure each one in my heart.

Of all the gifts God has given me, motherhood is the best! I just hope I have proved worthy of the honor.

Thanks for reading my blog.